Right here, right now – practically
If you are enlightened, you probably do not need this text. If you are not enlightened, “enlightenment” is just a concept, an idea. It is not part of your experience, you do not know it. If you do not know it, if you have not experienced it – why is this word so meaningful to you? Maybe because it seems to promise you something – in other words, because you project something onto it. “When I am enlightened, then… I am redeemed.” What you project onto it is a state in which your suffering has ended. So, let us recap what enlightenment is: a word, a sound, a thought which signifies to you “once I reach this, I will not suffer anymore”. This means that what you really want is not to be enlightened, but you want your suffering to end.
So, in your case, enlightenment is a mental concept that means an escape (from the prison of your suffering). Similarly, there are many other mental concepts in society that can seem to be an escape, for example: owning a home, having a family, children, money, psychotherapy, approval. And also in spirituality, there are ideas like: collecting positive karma, finding your soulmate, cleansing your pineal gland, Merkaba activation, Manifesting, finding your home planet, awakening the Kundalini, following a vegan diet, and so on. Once you have attempted all these things and they failed to resolve your suffering, the last thing left on your mind will be self-destruction, ultimately suicide. At the end of this path, the hope not to suffer anymore will be projected onto the time after suicide, which is, as we know by now, also a fallacy. So, to sum up, there are three domains in which we have mental projections for a suffering-free future: society, spirituality and self-destruction.
This text is about the most deceiving and difficult obstacle on the path towards enlightenment: the idea of enlightenment or awakening itself. Actually, at this point right here, we will leave the mind and its reasoning behind altogether. So do not worry if you get confused, irritated or disoriented while reading. This can happen. These are signs that the mind loses its dominance.
If you are caught up in your hopes for a suffering-free future, your attention is in your thoughts. However, we do not suffer from our thoughts, but from a stress response in our bodies which has been created and is being maintained by our autonomous nervous system (ANS) without our conscious control. From these deep levels (bottom-up), our ANS colours our perceptions, our thoughts, self-images and feelings. We experience these coloured perceptions, thoughts, self-images and feelings as a deep, permanent sense of self, which we call “I”.
In this document, I would like to offer you a real escape. This escape does not necessarily lead to enlightenment, but it leads to a happy, fulfilled and largely suffering-free life. Writing this text enables me, the author, to channel a stream of thoughts into your awareness. This is what happens when you read this document, just as you are doing now. So, right now, as I am typing this text, I am writing into your awareness that which arises in my awareness almost on its own. And if you are open to it and you place some trust in this process and me, it is possible for me to positively affect your nervous system through this transfer.
If you want to get the most out of these words, it is necessary that you surrender a little bit of your protection from the outside and your protection from the inside. I am on your side here. I want nothing but to support you, to transfer you everything I have collected in my life that is valuable and helpful. This also happens between the lines, just as it does now, as an emotion. I am speaking to you in this very moment, even if there seems to be time that has passed between the typing and your reading.
So, as we are now on this journey together, towards the depths of our nervous systems, take a moment to see how this feels. See if this text, in the way it presents itself to you, arouses feelings of danger inside you, or feelings of relaxation. How do you feel now, while reading this, when you feel that there is someone here, even if it is just a connection through words? This connection is there, otherwise you would not be reading this. How is it when you let yourself sink in a little bit into this feeling that there is someone here with you, walking you through this text, who is fully here, guiding your attention a little bit, someone who is well informed and very experienced with the inner world, with neurophysiology, meditation and therapy. Now, imagine that the one whose words are now appearing inside your awareness also has some compassion, or even an open heart, for you. In consciousness, everything is possible. And so, now, as I am typing this text, in this very moment, I have in front of my eyes and in front of my heart all the people who will be reading this text. So, it is possible to create a bridge of connection that transcends space and time.
Now you might feel some relaxation, and relaxation can be felt in your body when it feels safe. The body feels safe when it feels connected to other people. So, once more, I emphasize the importance of this connection, which is me, as the author, speaking directly to all the desperate and seeking people, channeling all the energy I can into these words.
This could be called an act of magic: My presence reaches yours, even through these typed words. In this very moment, which is only consciousness, we meet each other.
So far, so good… Take a moment to choose whether you would like to continue with me on this journey or rather close this document.
Being in contact is the most important thing for our nervous systems. All we want is to be able to relax while being in contact, while being connected to other people. We open ourselves up to someone, we begin to communicate, and if we decide that this person is safe to be with – he or she is neither aggressive nor dissociated – and we feel good with this person, then we relax into this state of connection. In this state of connection, of relaxation, the body can surrender some of its high vigilance that is used to detect danger. Instead, when this can happen, the body will begin to regenerate and heal itself. In terms of neurophysiology, this means that the ventral pathway of our parasympathetic nervous system is active. This state can occur in activities of immobilization, like cuddling, breastfeeding or meditating. But it can also occur in mobilization without fear, like, for example, dancing, playing or singing ????. What is most important during these activities is always the eye contact between the people who are participating. Through the medium of eye contact, we signal each other that we have peaceful intentions and that we are safe to approach and be approached by each other. When we approach each other without fear of danger, we can focus on another human being without defense (survival) circuits being active in our nervous system. This process, coming close to each other while being relaxed, leads us to feeling compassion, connection, and ultimately love. Compassion, connection and love are byproducts of a peaceful coming closer to each other. They cannot be “done”.
The state of being peaceful is a neurophysiological state OF THE BODY, of the autonomic nervous system. It cannot be achieved by pure reasoning / willpower of the mind !!!
When we really connect, we feel so good, so fulfilled – so “at home” in our bodies and with the people around us – that there is a strong feeling of being whole, being healed. In this state, there is nothing wrong with the world, there is no suffering. So, there is also no more pressure to resolve any suffering by becoming enlightened.
How do you feel when you read these words?
As we go further down this path beyond thoughts, beyond the idea of enlightening, we leave all those obstacles behind in the mind, and we arrive at what really matters: The body. So, I continue to invite you to feel the body. Do you feel the body now, as you are reading? Or are you somehow disconnected from sensing your body, only perceiving the thoughts that are formed inside your mind through this text? If this is so, I invite you to start sensing the body again, so that you do not lose it. Maybe just take a few deep breaths and let your attention be in the body. What do you feel, how do you feel? How does this body feel to you? Does it feel tight and contracted, or relaxed and wide open?
When you sense contraction, try and feel your belly. Does it feel contracted there, or in the shoulders? Contraction of big muscles always means that the body wants to protect itself from danger, from being hurt. So, it believes that there is a danger or threat for which it needs to be prepared to protect itself from. But what is the danger right now, while you are reading this document?
Now, look around and check repeatedly, consciously, if you are safe where you are right now. Is there an imminent danger or threat to your physical survival, to your body?
If you arrive at the observation that you are safe where you are, then you could risk letting go a little and relaxing the body. I am here, too, so you are not alone. And now, look around again, whether something bad happens as you let go now. Is there something happening out there, or is it rather calm?
What it is all about is to help your body to recognize that, right here, right now, there is no more danger present and that you are safe. The mind knows this, of course, but the deep layers of the brain and nervous system are affected by old imprints from childhood which color the entire perception we have as adults. Indeed, most people still live in the first three years of their lives without noticing it. And if these first three years were shaped by distressing relationship patterns – which is in fact the norm, in this corrupted society we live in – we continue to suffer as adults. And the more destructive the experiences with our parents were that we had during this time, the more we suffer as adults. But the suffering arises from within the deep layers of our nervous system, from implicit memory, so we are unable to assign it to our past, our early childhood. Instead, we say: I have anxiety, panic attacks, depression, meaninglessness, allergies, relationship problems, etc…
The reason for this is that, during these early years, the brain has extremely high neuroplasticity. The brain forms and develops according to the experiences we have! If, during this time, a child experiences permanent distress or suffering by not feeling safe, connected and loved by its parents, it becomes this suffering. It does not feel the suffering as an experience, but as if it itself IS the suffering!
What all this means is that an experience of separation, of disconnection is imprinted deeply and physically. The earlier this happens, the stronger it will be taken for reality. “Taken for” reality because it is imprinted in the nervous system as a deep pattern, but now, in an adult life, it no longer has any basis in the outside world. In the body, this imprint is being maintained by, for example, unconscious tensing of the psoas muscle, the abdominal muscles and lowering of the diaphragm.
All of this has made perfect sense throughout evolution. The body is not stupid, it always chooses what is best for us. Anything we call “suffering” or “illness” are efforts of adaptation!
What you are looking for is the regulation of your autonomic nervous system, by connecting with other people. For what you seek, for what all mammals seek, you need companions. There is no way alone. This is the neurophysiological reality: we cannot be happy alone, even if we are being told this again and again. It is a lie, with catastrophic consequences for people with severe developmental / relational trauma. The species of mammals has evolved through cooperation, not through war or isolation. Being able to relax while being in contact with other people is what healing IS, and it opens the door to spirituality. But to try to use spiritual concepts, like enlightenment, to resolve the suffering caused by a dysregulated nervous system and its consequences, like loneliness, is the wrong way!
Only when the autonomous nervous system is at peace, can the mind also be at peace. It does not work the other way around – otherwise, you would have already been healed by all the self-help literature and enlightened people’s teachings.
The way to resolve your suffering directly and transform everything is:
- Listen to people and speak to them: Tell them how you feel!
- Return to the body: For example, with TRE®, dancing, yoga, singing, or physical exercise!
THIS IS EVERYTHING YOU NEED – EVERYTHING !!!